Beheading dangerous snowmen

I don't know if you noticed that literally hours after the 2-inch snow we had in south-west London during February, that our snowmen had been beheaded. "Who had so savagely chopped off their heads?" I wondered with a melting heart.

Apparently, it was our local councils. I'm yet to find out who's job spec this all-important role belongs to and how our tax money pays for this service.

Sadly, we are victim to the apparent safeguarding of our parks and grasslands, where a beheaded snowman will melt faster AND - believe it or not - were also being destroyed for health and safety reasons!

Headless snowmen lying broken across our common